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Movie Review: Jurassic World

Geek Alabama Movie Review

On this Movie Reviews post, I am going to review Jurassic World. The new dinosaur freak out movie that has become the highest grossing film over an opening weekend ever! Yep, dinosaurs have beaten superheroes; this is something Marvel has taken notice of.

So, I used a free movie ticket to go see Jurassic World at my local theater. I was afraid that this movie would be too cheesy and only care about the biggest and baddest dinosaurs. You know, there are a lot more than dinosaurs, right? I am here to say that I used my free movie ticket wisely, and this was worth seeing, and you must see this! So, I am going into more detail below so if you have not seen this movie, don’t read below, SPOILER ALERT!

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The movie begins in Christmas time with plenty of snow on the ground. Parents were getting ready to send their kids to “Jurassic World” on Isla Nublar. This is a full dinosaur theme park, and people here are stupid and crazy to trust that nothing bad would happen, right? The theme park has everything you need in a dinosaur theme park. Holographic dinosaurs and museum, a dinosaur petting zoo, a dinosaur monorail, a downtown area with everything you need including a Starbucks and a jewelry store, a Sea World type attraction with a Mosasaurus, a gyroscope attraction where you see a dinosaur savannah, and lots more!

I am going to say this, the first 30 minutes of this movie was quite boring. I wanted to see the action quickly! I was kind of hoping one of those small petting zoo dinosaurs would have bitten off a hand of one of those small kids, that would have gotten the action going in a gruesome and violent way! Anyways, the kids are named Zach and Gray Mitchell, and they got VIP access to the park because their aunt named Claire Dearing is the park’s operations manager. But don’t worry, Claire is too busy watching those beautiful dinosaurs in that fancy control room, and she has her assistant named Zara watch the kids. And as usual, the assistant loses the kids; her punishment comes later in the movie!

The park was too busy playing God by recruiting more investors with bigger dinosaurs to maintain the park’s attendance. To get bigger dinosaurs, InGen’s geneticists have created a new genetically modified dinosaur called Indominus rex made from the DNA of several predatory dinosaurs. Yeah, playing God has worked so well in the past Jurassic Park movies. And before I go further, kudos to the writers for including a character who was wearing a classic Jurassic Park shirt! Also, kudos for exploring the old Jurassic Park enclosure later in the movie! We can’t forget about our past, can’t we!

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We then see Chris Pratt who is Owen Grady, a Velociraptor expert and trainer. Yes, Chris was a dinosaur animal trainer in this movie. I mean, why in the hell would you train dinosaurs? You learn later in the movie why training dinosaurs is a very bad idea! You know what is worse? Using Velociraptors for the US Military! Vic Hoskins, head of InGen security, is interested in training the park’s four Velociraptors for military use. I mean, using dinosaurs for military police, how well will that go, and how many people would be eaten alive before these dinosaurs were bombed?

Soon, the quiet stuff ends and the crazy stuff begin! First off, that genetically modified dinosaur had the smarts of a human being. He fooled the staff that he escaped the enclosure, and it lured some people to their deaths! The only downside here is the death scenes were not that gruesome! There was hardly any blood and guts. I so wanted to see the same blood and guts you see on The Walking Dead, but I guess that would have meant Jurassic World would be rated “R.” Seriously, I was yelling “YES” in the theater when the dinosaurs killed those security guards. And oh man, the action gets better!

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The team in that high tech control room needed their brains checked, because they actually sent a large security team to capture, but not kill the Indominus. Yeah, we had a bunch of stupid people in that control room. Maybe that old school Jurassic Park shirt was making everyone stupid! Most of the security team is killed and/or eaten alive. Here we go again, we needed to see more blood and gore, but we got PG’ish type violence instead, I want the violence everyone! So, the fancy control room sees everyone dying, and it finally gets across their stupid heads that they might need to evacuate the park? Well, it was too little too late, as you see later in the movie!

While this was going on, Gray and Zach were in the gyrosphere. And sure the dinosaurs were neat to see, but why was Jimmy Fallon being the instructional person? If I was in that gyrosphere, I would not want a comedian telling me how I can stay safe from dinosaurs! Boy, it kind of makes me feel bad, but I kind of wished Jimmy Fallon was actually a person in this movie, who was violently killed by a dinosaur. The same goes for Jimmy Buffet, who was also in this movie! Gray and Zach sneak away in that gyrosphere, and I was secretly wishing at least one of those kids would be killed in this movie; it was about time after all.

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Gray and Zach encounter that Indominus, and are almost killed, darn it Chris Pratt for saving the day! Other than the kids being spoiled and stupid, I liked how you saw that the younger kid was a true geek! They jumpstarted a jeep and got back to the main village. And yes Owen and Claire survive too. We see a part in the movie where any person who loves animals has their heartstrings pulled. We see an Apatosaurus take its last breath, with some great puppetry work! After this, the real actions and deaths begin! A helicopter crash kills a couple of people, then the pterosaurs escape, and the fun begins. My only gripe, I wished the peterosaurs would have caused more deaths and gore! That death of Zara was a treat! This would have been a good time to see kids and entire families dying!

Because of the mayhem, Hoskins assumes command and decides to use the Velociraptors to track and kill the Indominus; Owen reluctantly agrees with the plan. Yes, this is the part where Chris Pratt is riding the motorcycle with those velociraptors. But, no one plans what happens next! The indominus gets the veociraptors to turn on the humans, and more deaths begin! Again, more blood and gore please! I go into a dinosaur movie wanting to see blood, guts, and gruesome deaths! This is the part where you can tell they were planning future movies! Hoskins has Dr. Wu helicoptered off the island with dinosaur embryos, protecting his dinosaur research. Time for more Jurassic World movies!

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Soon, Owen, Claire, Zach, and Gray find themselves alone in the downtown area. Ah yes, we see a raptor killing off Vic Hoskins. That was one of the least violent deaths of the entire movie! The biting off of the hand was like trying! You need to bring in experts from The Walking Dead to show you how gruesome a hand being bitten off can be! This was also a good revenge death, no one will miss you Vic! And then the writing and storylines get very bland! Yes, the battle between the Indominus and the T-Rex was cool! But why were the four humans not running, and running far away? I was so hoping the indominus would have killed off that younger kid, it was so close! And you can tell that there were plenty of product placements here! Hey guys, now is a good time to get a diamond ring while a T-Rex was trying to eat you! Come on, the product placements were lame!

Yes, the four people escape. Owen and Claire kiss each other. Zach and Gray will never want to see dinosaurs ever again. And the lawyers were already in that airport hanger meeting with those injured in a dinosaur amusement park. Who on a jury would believe that going to a dinosaur amusement park was a smart move by the way? If this was real life, I don’t think any lawsuits would be successful. Next time be smart for once, and don’t encounter dinosaurs! These injured people won’t have to worry about dinosaurs anymore, but do not worry! The park will soon be open once again!

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Jurassic World is blowing everyone’s expectations out of the water! Obviously, Universal will now be planning for more movies in front of dinosaurs. The next movie might not be in a dinosaur amusement park, but we will soon get to relive our appetite for dinosaurs. As for this movie, the writing and storylines were sometimes bland, but the action scenes were awesome and jumping out of your seat fun! I wish the movie would have included more blood, more gore, more guts, and more gruesome deaths! This is what I wanted. What I got instead was a Disney-like version of what a violent dinosaur movie should be! It could have been better in the death department, and I hope the next Jurassic World will have better deaths!

To sum things up, Jurassic World was a good movie! And I would go see it, it was worth it! But Universal, make the next Jurassic World even better. Even if the movie has to be rated “R”, okay!

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