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Sunday Discussion: Asperger’s In A Hopeless World



I am making this Sunday Discussion on a Monday very personal!  I wrote my Thanksgiving wishes for 2012. (don’t have hardly any wishes)  Read it by clicking the link.

This is going to be a very tough Christmas season for me this year.  It’s almost like being in the ultimate dumps.  I have been unemployed for 17 months now!  And I am still searching for my 14th job in seven years.  Since I am prone to losing jobs I have lived in many places around the country since I was born.  I would like to stay in NE Alabama since many people know me and the Geek Alabama blog.  I am wondering if that will happen.  Here is the places where I have lived.

Over the past 17 months since being fired from Fed Ex.  I have done many things which I thought would mean a job.  First; I went out and covered many events in NE Alabama/NW Georgia.  Many people have come to Geek Alabama and enjoyed the photos and videos I have done.  Some of the events I have covered have also raised a lot of money for people who need it.

Of course this is something I would love to continue to do.  But sadly no one has decided to hire me.  What puzzles me the most is several people have talked to me at these events and have said they know someone who might hire me.  They say they will contact me back and then I wait and wait.  Several weeks later I see the same person again at a different event and they don’t even talk to me.  I have gone through this with many people and it annoys me big time!  I love going out and helping to promote certain events.  I also get contacted by people online asking me to come out to their events as well.  Geek Alabama likes to help make communities better.  But at the same time I would like to earn some money for it as well; that’s not happening.

Since I have talked about being unemployed on Geek Alabama and on social media.  Some people out there think I am some lazy fat slob.  During the presidential race I sent out this tweet which was picked up by CNN Headline News.  Many people shared my status but Douglas Cole had to bad mouth me.  I believe this is a big problem in this country and here in Alabama.  Many people view the long-term unemployed as being lazy which is not true.  I have been to 14 job fairs across Alabama and I go online daily to see what’s new.  I have had two interviews since July 2011.  I also talk to people at the events I cover to see what jobs are open as well.

The jobs are not there right now!  Here in Anniston 250 more people are losing their jobs at the end of the year.  I wish people would care about the long-term unemployed instead of just blowing them off.  I know I have several factors that employers view as harmful to their business.  I know I am overweight and obese; sure I am trying to get into shape but that is hard right now.  When you go without eating some days to save money you will not lose weight.  I can’t afford to go to the gym or see a nutritionist because of low-income as well.  I know I have very yellow teeth as well.  I know some employers will hire based on looks and that is wrong as well.  But here is the biggest reason why I am not employed.

I have said on Geek Alabama that I have Asperger’s Syndrome many times.  One of the symptoms of having Asperger’s is being very clumsy.  If it’s a fast paced job I will eventually screw it up. I have done my fair share of messing things up while working where the employers sees me as a liability and then let’s me go back into unemployment.  Even while not having a job I will also mess things up.  The steering wheel in my car is messed up and the focus viewer in the DSLR camera is scratched.  I have not washed my hair in months to save money.  And the frame in my bed is all broken; so I sleep in a chair.  The camera will cost around $200 to fix.  The car; around $1000 to fix.  I could admit more bad things I have done but I will not do that.

Another trait of Asperger’s is social and communication difficulties.  One problem is talking about topics to other people.  Some of my interests includes roads and highways and when I talk about this some people thinks I have gone crazy.  I also have a very tough time recognizing other people.  When I talk to someone and I see them again down the road I do not know their names or, I do not remember what we talked about the last time we met. When someone contacts me on social media saying we met at this event I say to myself “who are you?”  People with Asperger’s have trouble with what’s called “active but odd.”  This is the failure to react appropriately to social interaction which appears as disregard for other people’s feelings, and it may come across as insensitive.

James Holmes in court.

I believe another harm to people with Asperger’s is the media.  Whenever there is a mass shooting or event that harms other people; some people think the shooter or crazy person has Asperger’s Syndrome.  Remember the Colorado theater shootings?  Some people thought the shooter James Holmes has Asperger’s Syndrome or Bi-Polar Disorder.  Not all people with Asperger’s are crazy psychopaths!  I think this is a reason why I am still unemployed. When someone receives my application they see Geek Alabama and then they see I have Asperger’s Syndrome.  Then they form the opinion that I am a crazy person and throws the application and resume into the shredder.  Sure; I might be clumsy and break something or have a tough time talking to other co-workers.  But it DOES NOT mean I can’t do the job.  I wish discrimination against people with disabilities would stop for good!

I believe another problem is my views on stuff from gay marriage, corporations, and other controversial stuff.  Some of my personal views are the same from people in California, New York, and other left-leaning states.  I believe two people from the same gender should get married.  I believe corporations should pay their workers a fair wage.  I believe everyone should have affordable healthcare without going bankrupt.  I also believe some people are abusing entitlement programs like food stamps and those people need to be drug tested.  I also believe in God and Jesus Christ.  I made this video when state politicians wanted to harm animals by shutting down the low-cost spay and neuter clinics.  They were not happy.

My political views are right down the middle.  And when I talk about some of the crazy things here from politicians in Alabama; they don’t like me!   I am guessing the potential employers reads this stuff and decides not to hire me.  All because I have different views than most people in Alabama.  By the way I voted for Obama again.

I love to talk about great things in Alabama and the things that interest me.  Hey; I love roads, traffic lights, weather, pets and animals, and trains among other things.  That’s why I call myself an Road, Weather, and News Junkie Geek.  I know I have screwed up many things in my life.  But this does not make me a crazy person.  I just wish people would be more accepting of people with disabilities.  I have tried places like the Alabama Department of Rehabilitation Services.  After a complaint down to Montgomery they have not helped me since.  They sent someone from the Opportunity Center here in Anniston and they never helped me much as well.  I don’t belong in a group home; I am not severely disabled like some people are.  Sure I make mistakes but it should not be a limiting factor.

Now I am facing my latest challenge; my unemployment ran out and I have only $50 left in the bank. (had to pay the car insurance)  This week I will go a few days without eating anything and wondering what to do next.  Many people would say go to college; but I really struggled in school and if it was not for the teacher study guides (answers for the test) I would have failed the grade and held back.  The classes where I did not have much help; I earned D’s and almost flunked out.  Maybe I need to consider schools that help people with Asperger’s Syndrome, ADHD, learning disabilities, etc.  These places would help me get through college and improve my study skills, cooking skills, being less clumsy, building self-esteem, and self-confidence.  And when you have gone through abuse as a child and been homeless twice. (very short times)  You pretty much have no confidence in your life.

Yes my fridge is about empty.

I wish a divided country would come back together again.  I also wish money would not be a factor in life.  I wish we lived in the Star Trek world.  They never worried about money and no one ever went hungry.  I know that is a TV world but I wish we lived in that world today.  Everyone would be living a happier and stress-free life!

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